Rope bondage is boring and slow

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Rope bondage is boring and slow

(As one or two people have read the first couple of paragraphs of this post and gone bonkers without reading the whole thing in context I’d like to just add this note to recommend that you read the whole thing first.

I wrote this article because people keep insisting on telling myself, my partner, friends that rope bondage is boring and slow. If they find it so then that’s up to them. It’s their going out of their way to tell someone that does like that they don’t like it that I find rude and ignorant. Also their narrow-mindedness and lack of imagination in being unable to accept that it may be a different experience for others.)

Is it? Can’t say I’ve ever noticed that myself.

Inverted rope bondage suspension in performance in London

Slow and boring dynamic suspension during the London festival of the art of Japanese bondage.

I honestly find that rope is as slow or quick as I want it to be. I think that often the reason that some people characterize rope as slow and boring is that they are themselves slow and boring.

Let’s face it, without skill or imagination you can make anything boring.

There might be a secondary reason some think that rope is slow and boring. That being that someone has only watched someone slow and boring doing rope, formed their impression and being a person of limited imagination are sticking to that as an absolute. I’ve no idea why some people are like that but it’s clear that some are.

The thing that always beggars belief is the need some people who don’t do bondage have to tell other people that they don’t like bondage “because it’s slow” as if that were some kind of absolute truth. I don’t like some kinds of play and feel absolutely zero compunction to tell people what I don’t like in casual conversation. Why on earth do they need to do that? To not only be ignorant but to demonstrate their ignorance? Do they really think that people will not notice that reality doesn’t match up with what they say? Do they think that you’ll say ‘oh wow, you’re right, this thing that I really like, really is slow and boring just like you’re telling me’?

One of the side thoughts that comes to me from this is the apparently automatic assumption that slow = boring. Why?

Most of the time I want sessions to last want to draw out the feeling of tying. It’s not just something to be gotten out of the way. Is all your kink something to be gotten out of the way? The faster something can be done the better the kink? Well if that’s what you’re like with your play and sensual life that’s up to you. If not, if you think that some things are worth taking your time over… well what’s your point?

I think that again this can be the result of failing to see the possibilities. Some seem to see bondage only as an means to an end something to be done before kink rather than being a kink and therefore cannot see beyond their preconception. There’s nothing wrong with using bondage as a means to an end but that’s not the same as being unable to see that it can be more than a means to an end.

Intimate in rope bondage performance in London

Further snooze inducing rope bondage activity.

Rope bondage can indeed be quick and utilitarian. It can take seconds… or it can take hours if you choose. One of its great strengths is that it is so flexible. Rope is infinitely flexible but you need to acquire skills to make use of that flexibility.

Once you have the skills you can make rope anything from sensual to extremely torturous. Extremely quick to indefinitely drawn out. The choice becomes yours.

 

Slow and boring?

If you know what you’re doing you can make it slow and interesting………… and hot and sensual and nasty and loving and painful and…

By | 2017-03-17T09:57:16+00:00 September 18th, 2012|Categories: Bondage, Life, Rope|Tags: , , , , |2 Comments

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2 Comments

  1. Grizz September 18, 2012 at 8:28 pm

    Often a question of who your audience really is, spectators, a camera, or the bottom. The scenes where the bottom two days later still has warm fuzzies … I’d say my speed was “just right”.

  2. johny_rigger September 19, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    Who does say that rope bondage is slow? Men? Sure men. Those who are quick in bed… But women like it slow (well maybe this is not the right word, they want “more”). You know. That guys are boring and not good in bed.

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